Today I'm just feeling overwhelmed. I'm on information overload. All my wondering about the future weighing me down and consuming my thoughts. The worry and to-do list consuming me. If I'm honest, I'll admit I'm thinking..."but we've already been through enough trials to last a lifetime, Lord. We shouldn't have to go through anymore hard stuff. We've had enough-now everything else in our lives has got to be easy-breezy or we're just not going to be able to handle it. We deserve a smooth, straight path with no bumps-big or small."
Yep, that's what I'm thinking right about now. But you know what? That's not what's happening. An easy-peasy life with no more troubles is not what we are living. Enduring excruciating tragedy does not exempt us (as much as I would like it to) from experiencing other challenges in this life. Now somehow I have to summon the courage to meet them head on and with a good attitude, even through my veil of grief. That dull-ache of grief that makes even really happy things just a tad bit sad and really sad things that much sadder.
Now, I know all of you are going to be wondering if something has happened with the baby...and no, thankfully it has not. All doctor's reports to date point to a healthy baby growing inside my belly - and we are so very thankful. These difficulties stem from my trying to figure it all out. To dissect this path the Lord has my family on. To want to know the end of this story when we are just at the beginning.
I pulled out a book my mom gave me on our wedding day 8 years ago called, "God's promises for your every need." Under a page titled, "What to do when troubles hit your life" I found this verse...
Take therefore no thought for the morrow; for the morrow shall take thought for the things of itself. Sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof. Matthew 6:34
I turned to the same verse in "The Message" translation and discovered I had underlined this passage in dark, deep lines...
...don't get worked up about what may or may not happen tomorrow. God will help you deal with whatever hard things come up when the times comes. Matthew 6:34
I think I'll be writing this verse on a notecard for my dashboard or refrigerator. It's one I need to constantly remind myself of to help keep the feelings of being overwhelmed at bay.